“Some things cannot be taught; they must be experienced. You never learn the most valuable lessons in life until you go through your own journey.” – Roy T. Bennett

Has it really been 3 whole years since I’ve posted in this blog? Wow. When I started this blog, I had the intention that I would be consistently posting stories of my life and sharing things I discovered with others. Well, the Universe had other plans for me, and life decided to smack me in the face instead. They say a lot can happen in a year - imagine the changes over 3 years! Let’s recap…I’ve changed jobs 3 times, moved into a house with a guy for the first time EVER, gotten engaged, and gotten married. I’ve experienced some of the highest highs and some of the lowest lows of my life. Now, while focusing on the future and next chapter of my life, I’m taking some time to reflect on several of the valuable lessons I’ve learned along the way. I’ll be doing a deeper dive into these lessons over the course of the next year so be on the lookout for future posts!

Top 13 Things I’ve Learned:

#1: It’s OK to quit.

Quit that job, that relationship, that habit, or that thing you don’t like doing. If it’s not bringing you joy, then KonMari (Marie Kondo) that crap right out of your life. Sometimes quitting one thing, opens doors to another BETTER thing. Other times, quitting simply means removing yourself from a negative situation.

#2: Money can change people - sometimes for the worse.

Money can often negatively impact someone who is un-grounded in their nature. Henry Ford actually said it best: “Money doesn’t change men, it merely unmasks them. If a man is naturally selfish or arrogant or greedy, the money brings that out, that’s all.” I’ve seen the negative impacts (and positive!) of money firsthand in both business and personal scenarios over the years.

#3: Prioritize self-care.

Sometimes you have to stop everything else that you are doing in order to take care of yourself. You can’t give fully to the others in your life when you are constantly running on empty. You need to take a TIME OUT for yourself - go for a long walk, meditate, take a bath, put on a robe and face mask and watch a cheesy Hallmark movie…do nothing but YOU for a minute and fill your tank.

#4: You are tougher and smarter than you think.

When faced with a new job or new task that you don’t know much about, it’s easy to doubt yourself and get overwhelmed. Honestly, sometimes you have to fake it until you make it, and believe me when I say that you are much stronger and smarter than you think you are in these situations. Let the uncomfortable thing stretch you beyond your comfort zone - that’s where growth truly happens.

#5: It’s OK to ask for help.

When life gets hard, which it always does from time to time, it’s important to call in reinforcements. You should seek a TRIBE of people to see you through your situation (a therapist, a counselor, a friend, a mentor, a coach, a minister, etc.). I fully believe in having a therapist or life/business coach. Every successful person out there will tell you that they don’t succeed on their own - they have people smarter than them holding them accountable for their life’s decisions and actions. Find someone (or better yet, a whole group of people) to help you out and hold you accountable. Asking for help does not make you weak - it’s actually a sign of strength to look beyond yourself for solutions.

#6: Have faith.

It’s important to have and maintain faith (in God, in yourself, in your family, in your decisions, etc.). When you are going into the unknown, faith is sometimes the only thing that will get you through. People and situations will often surprise you. Stay positive and keep the faith. “Surrender to what is; let go of what was; have faith in what will be”. - Sonia Ricotti

#7: Set your intentions and put them out into the Universe.

The Universe works in harmony with your intentions when you’re on the right path. Put out positive energy and positive intentions, and you will receive it back ten fold. This involves more than just thinking about your intentions. You need to write them down and share them with others. Believe in your intentions, and they will be so.

#8: Stop trying to fill the void with material possessions.

Stop looking towards material possessions to bring you happiness. Sure, a retail purchase will give you a quick dopamine hit, but you will always come back wanting more. Sometimes you need to take a look inside yourself and figure out what is not making you happy. Do you need to go to the gym and work on your body? Do you need to meditate and work on your mind? Do you need to actively seek a higher power?

#9: True friends will show up for you.

When you have big life moments - whether positive or negative - true friends will make time and show up for you in ways that you never imagined. “In life, we never lose friends, we only learn who the true ones are.” - Unknown

#10: Accept your imperfections.

Stop playing the comparison game with everyone on social media, in your neighborhood, in your circle of friends, etc. Accept your imperfections and wear them confidently. Your external confidence will outshine any imperfections. Like my grandmother always said, “pretty is as pretty does”, and I truly believe that.

#11: Gratitude is the key to happiness.

You don’t have to keep up with the Joneses. Take time every day to remind yourself of all the things you are grateful for in your life. What are you grateful for? Make a gratitude list and refer back to it when you find yourself constantly wanting more, living outside of your means, or comparing yourself to others.

#12: Love always wins, and true love won’t give up.

Social media and what we portray to the outside world can make our relationships look easy. Truth is, relationships are hard and often messy. It would actually be easier to give up sometimes than to work through the struggles. I always like to remind myself when I’m feeling down on love: “Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.” - 1 Corinthians 13.7

#13: Accept change as it comes and don’t fight it.

I get it - we like the status quo - it’s a safe, known place to be. I’m here to tell you that it’s OK to mess up, fail, and fall flat on your face. Sometimes it feels like the Universe is against you and throwing out one curve ball after another, but in reality, there are lessons that you need to learn before you can move on to your next highest good. And the Universe will keep teaching you those lessons until you get it. There are seasons in life - embrace them. Change can be a good thing if you roll with it.